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A Mother's Testimonial from a Parent Emotional CPR Training by Janet Wong

Janet WongI think Emotional CPR can benefit me greatly as a mother, a daughter, a wife, a neighbor, a friend, and generally as a compassionate human being.  If we could all just take the time to be aware and connect with the feelings of those around us, especially people who might be experiencing some form of crisis be it small or large, we can potentially help others have a happier and healthier life. 

As a parent, eCPR will help me connect better with my own children, instead of just asking why they have not done certain things or telling them what exactly they needed to do, I will instead try to talk with them on a more personal nonjudgmental level to understand what might have happened to them throughout the day and their general wellbeing and feelings, and then encourage them to come up with their own ways that they believe to be helpful to achieve what they need to accomplish or resolve the problems at hand. 

Children turns into teenagers and then to young adults and later adults of this society, it is very important to treat their feelings with the same respect that you would with others, they might be even more sensitive and vulnerable but not knowing how to express those feelings in the right words, so we truly need to listen attentively and not talk down to them and scare them from opening up and connecting with us, it is crucial because if they can build that trust as young children and know how to connect with others during times of crisis, they can be better mentally prepared for the emotional challenges of the real world as teenagers and adults.

The Parent eCPR training was an eye-opening and immensely valuable experience for me.  The parents and trainers I had the pleasure to meet during those 3 weeks were all extraordinary folks.  Many of which are survivors of incredibly challenging life experiences but are very willing to open up and share their feelings and encounters with the group, which is applaudable and speaks to the comfortable and trusting environment the trainers were able to create for all the participants to connect heart-to-heart.  Participants have a wonderful time connecting during the sessions and come out with a sense of being empowered with useful tools to better help ourselves and others around us through crisis. 

I would certainly recommend this training to others I know.  I believe this would be a useful life skill for the whole community to have.  Our society just don’t listen enough, we’re often just passers-by and by-standers to other fellow human’s experiences, and when we do talk with each other we don’t truly know how to communicate, much less “seeing” and “feeling” the emotion another person is going through.  Emotional CPR can help change that, to have this practice immersed into our culture and everyday life will be invaluable.     

Emotional CPR will change how you handle difficult situations both for yourself and for helping others with crisis.  You do not need to be a trained counseling or mental health professional to benefit from utilizing eCPR techniques to deepen day-to-day communications.  You just have to be present and have the willingness to connect to your true inner feelings, respect the person in front of you and his/her/their experiences without imposing your own values and judgement during the joint exploration to find new hope and purpose.  Give eCPR a try and you too will feel the difference :)

 

eCPR Training in Ottawa 10.11.2018

Here is what graduates of our online virtual eCPR certification program are saying:

Thank you so much for an absolutely brilliant, mind-blowing experience!

“I started using eCPR techniques while on call with my folks who were in crisis. Several of them called me back the following day just to say thank you and that they felt really heard. It is truly rare to get a call back from a person contacting the crisis line.”

“I started using eCPR with my friends and family members just to practice. I used it specifically with my best friend of 14 years. After the connection, she looked at me and said ‘In the last 14 years, I have never felt more heard and seen by you.’ That’s incredible.”

I really from the bottom of my heart loved the training.... I wish it was every week lol. Also, are there different ECPR trainings that I could take in the future?

I wanted to thank you for including us in your first virtual eCPR class! It was a great experience for all and we came away with an expanded understanding of and appreciation for the power of peer connection (which was considerable already)! You both were so tremendous in your compassionate approach to teaching and guiding us through the training under unusual and challenging circumstances. We all learned so much about listening, being present, and opening ourselves to others. Thank you so much and keep up the wonderful work that you are doing!

eCPR Testimony by a Social Circus Practitioner who participated in the training held October 11, 2018 in Ottawa, Canada

ReAwakening Relationships with Emotional CPR (eCPR) Part I

Bianca is a parent of two amazing children. She is passionate about making positive change in society in the areas of disability, mental health and trauma.

Bianca

I was given the amazing opportunity to attend the ReAwaken Conference. It was utterly amazing and the first time in my life experience I've seen a group of strangers unite, resulting in a community of connection, compassion, and friendships. I also attended the Emotional CPR (eCPR) training, an educational program that teaches people how to assist others through an emotional crisis, that followed the conference.

I left the eCPR training with renewed hope and awareness, challenging myself to bring this amazing therapeutic model into my home. My son, Zion, is 8 years old. He is autistic with other complex needs. Zion has always found it difficult to self-regulate his emotions. He has an assistance dog to help him at times. To give you a picture, my son was having daily, if not more than once a day, meltdowns which were resulting in some behaviors of concern.

The morning after training, I found myself in a situation where I could see the potential for using eCPR. I was able to sit with my son and use the model of Connect, Empower, and Revitalize. Normally the situation would have escalated to the point of a meltdown where behaviors of concern would have come into play. This time, I was not there to fix the problem but just to acknowledge and sit with those not-nice feelings.

This model has opened up my son's understanding that having emotions is okay and it is safe to be able to sit with one another, connect together, and be in a space of empowerment and healing. I have even expanded this to be included in all of Zion's therapy sessions. Even the therapists are in awe of his new-found awareness and understanding of emotions. We have done many years of therapy and seen only small steps. Yet in just three weeks of practicing Emotional CPR, this amazing, powerful model approach has changed our lives. Now we are no longer living in a battlefield but in a relationship filled with understanding, acknowledgement, compassion and growth.

ReAwakening Relationships with Emotional CPR (eCPR) Part II

Wow it’s been a year since I attended the Reawaken Conference and my first eCPR training. I am now a qualified facilitator of this unique, amazing, human based model. How has eCPR changed my life? I have reflected on this question many times. It has changed my life by showing me it is ok to be real and raw. eCPR has allowed me to connect with others through all levels of feelings coming up for each of us. This has dramatically changed my family, first and foremost.

What a transformation in stopping and truly listening to all of what Zion has to say with all of my being. As discussed in the training, to listen with the Chinese character “Ting.” stands for “Listen” and has six steps to it: 1. Ears: to hear; 2. Mind: to think; 3. Body: to be present; 4. Eyes: to see; 5. Undivided Attention: to focus; 6. Heart: to feel. This sums up so much of how eCPR works.

My 15-year-old daughter now has also attended the training and the three of us are so connected now. We are able to sit with our feelings, connecting and hearing each other with whatever emotion may be arising. Some days it’s harder but we get there.

Previously Zion was on a positive behavioral plan due to some behaviors of concerns. Now in his NDIS plan it is written to use the eCPR model when Zion is in distress instead of the practices that were originally in his plan. And it works! Zion is able to slowly regulate down when he is being heard and validated but also hearing what is arising for the other person as well. We do lots and I do mean LOTS of check ins with the eCPR model. And my daughter now uses it with her friends, which has allowed her to feel connected with her peers but also to herself.

Only yesterday Zion started our chat with, “Mummy I feel sad that the person over there is homeless. It makes me want to go to them and tell them I am sad for them.” We spoke about what feelings were coming up for each of us. And we decided to write them a letter. It said:

Hi I’m only 8 but I saw you sitting there and no one looking at you. Lots of people walking past and one person also kicked your hat over. I felt invisible but not the kind of super power one. It was very sad and I hurt when you were invisible even though you really weren’t. I saw you. I want to be your friend. I know this won’t fix but I’m feeling a little bubble in my heart when I know I will be your friend and think of you. I would sing you the “you got a friend in me” song from toy story. My mum has helped me with this letter. From Z.


We walked over and along with the letter I gave the person some cash. Zion smiled and said, “We wrote you a letter. My mum can read it if you want.” The person seemed more bewildered but agreed. So together we sat and read the letter. At the end this person was in tears, they said no one has ever stopped and taken time. Zion and I both sat and we all talked some more. We sat with our emotions and the person said, “Thank you so much” and offered to buy a donut for Z next time we saw them. It was a beautiful moment of connection that allowed all of us to feel empowered and revitalized as we went about our day. Neither Zion nor I could fix the situation but we did allow space to be in connection together.

For me specifically this is a big step as a year ago my son did not have the means to be able to express the emotions with words or visual interpretation. A year ago it was recommended to put him on medication but I said no. And now with eCPR we have not needed that path as Zion is able to express and be heard but also hear others and is able to sit with them. I am so grateful for this model and proud of the caring young man my boy has always been but now people are able to see.


Here is what graduates of our two-day eCPR Certification Program are saying:

"Thanks for the AMAZING workshop we had today. Words can’t begin to describe how grateful I am for today’s experience and for having met you and your team. It has renewed my energy, motivation and conviction to fight for what I have always believed in and to work towards making my community and the world a better place. You have given me courage to stand up and open my heart to feel what others feel both in my profession and personal life (something that had always been a part of my personality and which I had been repressing for some time since I started my clerkships and Medicine in general). Today has been a very important and defining moment in my career and in my life. I am so very grateful ... I am deeply inspired by all of you and would love to acquire your knowledge to share with my community and my life". Beatriz Zayas - third year med student at the University of Puerto Rico after attending a eCPR workshop.

"I have never rated a training as high as I did this one because the quality of the content and the 'presenters' was the best I ever encountered."

"These are skills that - once acknowledged - I realize are intuitive and in my nature, but have not been supported through my education/other trainings. eCPR has brought a new breath to my work and my perspective."

“Anyone interested in improving their ability to connect and work with a person in an emotional/behavioral crisis will benefit from learning the three eCPR core practices; connecting, empowering and revitalizing. People who serve as crisis responders in the community; behavioral health workers, social workers, service coordinators, emergency medical professionals, fire service professionals, public safety and law enforcement professionals, volunteers, peer supporters, etc. will benefit from the simple, yet powerful keys to supporting a person during a time of crisis and the pathway eCPR suggests for helping the person move into recovery. eCPR’s greatest gift is its simplicity of use and the natural way that these practices are used by those who engage them.” Ed Riddell, M.S., Developmental Disability Services, Public Safety Specialist, State of Vermont and former Portland (OR) Police Bureau CIT Coordinator and Officer.

"In my 26 years of recovery I have not experienced anything as profound and empowering as the eCPR training. Thank you for helping me learn new tools and allowing myself to grow and express who I am. The whole training inspired me to be a better person and to not be embarrassed by who I am."

"It was one of the most profound experiences I have ever had. This is the kind of work I want to be doing to build community. It is a transformative process."

"It has been a great experience and has shown me powerful the gift of listening and support is. My only wish is that more of my co-workers were here to gain the knowledge and partake in the experience."

"I loved the eCPR training because it teaches us to connect with others as individuals, not a diagnosis, and not using a pre-determined method. This training, unlike other trainings I have attended, teaches us to honor the individual and their unique experience/crisis."

"eCPR training allowed me to have a connection with others in a way I've never had before. It's a necessary toll in such a computerized world not to lose connection, empowerment, and revitalization with one another as humans."

"Discussions, diads, triads, and final role-plays. Whew! Sure saw the three elements of eCPR in action - CONNECTING with compassion and concern to open up communication; emPOWERMENT to experience passion, purpose, and participation; and REVITALIZE one's sense of belonging in community through re-establishing equilibrium and balance, reconnecting to relationships, routines and roles in the community."

"I was struck by the powerful examples of connection and empathy provided throughout the workshop. Participants drew upon their own words instead of the tried and true labels communicating the feelings and offering support. Helping another human being rediscover their vitality - ah, how amazing. I would be remiss if I didn't mention how truly respectful you were of each person's individual expression, commentary, and true personal voice. What a joy to be with you these past three days."

"As a minister and spiritual director, I found that the skills of eCPR are very similar to what I practice as a spiritual director; hopeful attitude, accessing inner wisdom, identifying' a 'vital center', inspiring motivation. I see eCPR as a form of spiritual accompaniment."

"eCPR highlighted for me our diverse and unique gifts as supporters. The variety of approaches used to respond to the crises was very enlightening in learning how to best assist people through a crisis. We bring our whole self to the situation. We use our personal skills, experiences, and style. The honesty, trust, openness, sharing, and the exchange of feelings these past three days have left me deeply touched."

"I found eCPR particularly valuable in realizing people's humanity, no matter how hurt they are. I learned how to use my experience to be with folks and focus on getting them back to their natural supports. It is refreshing to realize that crises are a normal part of everyone's life."

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